May 21, 2004
.05.21.04. - ain't safe here 'nymore [rumor] *fng

[downtown]

(james)
the clock's ticking past 3am when the foyer door swings open
grand as that may sound, the lobby of this old building isn't anything to marvel at
the furniture looks as if perhaps it was a part of the original decor
purchased somewhere in the first quarter of the last century
what were once grandly patterened rugs are now little more than threadbare shadows
dust covers the wooden counters that forgot their deep laquered shine decades ago
notches cover the desk behind which a non-descript man of Italian descent thumbs through a newspaper

you can rent the rooms here by the hour, day, or week
a step up from the Motel 6 James last used as a getaway spot
this Hotel NoTell that's nothing more than a shadow of its architectually designed glory
but it serves purpose enough as a safehouse for times of need
regulars are a reasonable crowd, content to keep to themselves other than passing's polite nod
the nights are quiet aside from the occasional argument, gunshot, or answering siren
and the weekly cost practically nothing because barter's still an acceptable economy

a hand raises absent wave to Mauricio when the raggedyman passes by
metal grate barring the elevator breaking early morning's deserted silence
hinges protesting overdue maintenance as he drops them back down so doors close
(gotta add that to the list of chores Mr. Murphy gave me...)
thumb hitting the button which sends the car towards the top floor

twenty years ago the penthouse suite was something to brag about
each room on the seventh floor generously finished for the patron elite
financial struggles since have effectively changed that

some of the rooms are abandoned and empty
others compartmentalized in dreams of having more space to rent
rambling habitats condensed to a collection of perhaps two or three connective spaces with minimal furnishing
little more than a one-room apartment dressed up with 50% chance promise of a balcony
the Gnawer, luckily, bargained his way into one such room

but he's not thinking of parking it on the balcony to watch post-midnight cityscape as key hits lock and tumblers turn
he's thinking about a hot shower to wash away the sweat and grime reward of graveyard stockboy shift


(rumor)
the clock's ticking past 3am and she is asleep. Asleep at 3 am. Odd...In fact, too odd. Something didnt seem right about the way she was sleeping either...
First of all, the prankster ragamuffin would have instantly awoken to the sound of the silence broken by the elevator. light sleeper, always
Second of all, The way she was laying there, on the bed. Displayed onthe bed in a sports bra and black panties that had a picture of Sid and Nancy on the front. Sid grciously gicing any on-looker the middle finger. On her back. Scabs on her kness and elbows almost completely gone. Her clothing, nowhere to be found. There is nothing out of place, nothing broken, and nothing that seemed to show any sign of a struggle. maybe she just slept on top of the covers like that
But something wasnt right. Her breathing so shallow...Where were the overalls? The obnoxious t-shirt? Why when she laid there so soundly, did it seem like she wasnt sleeping soundly at all. eerie

The door, closed, but not locked. That had to be strange. She would have locked the door. She was not dumb. Certainly not irresponsible. That wasnt her way at all.
The TV was on, and loud. did it drown out the story that had been told hours before?
Some buff man was trying to sell his piece of work-out equipment. Infomercial. Crap...

(james)
the door swings open with, unexpectedly, no sound
that's the first thing that gets James' undivided attention
(didn't he tell her to lock the door....? she's smarter than that.....isn't she?)
the second inspires a frown at just how loud the television is
(luckily the seventh floor is mostly unoccupied save himself, and Mr. Murphy at the far end... )
he knows you have to turn it up to get the sound reasonably clear carrying from living into bedroom
and the set's an old piece of shit, anyway

but this is a little much....

shadows flickering across the wall in cadene with picture change on the screen silhouette what's next
his own cast growing larger with each step that snaps his body into Glabro
Corcoran's thumping floorboards beneath desperately random throwrugs
announcing the..... less than casual advance towards the inner domicile
lungs filling as lips part to taste the scents in the air

nothing out of place. nothing broken. no sign of a struggle.....

but the a/c unit in the window is struggling at full blast, rattling the wrench sitting on top
throwing fabric softener scents from the four fluffy towels resting on a chair at his animal senses
and beyond it, lingering musk of human male sweat and a woman's cheap perfume
(.... that doesn't belong....)
adrenaline pumps..... pulse rising..... even before he gets to the bedroom door

"RUM'R!"

televison CRASHES onto the floor
swiped from it's little rolling table with a claw-tipped hand
he's not wasting time fumbling for a button or searching for the controller's mute
barkedsnarl of her name shotgun blast in the sudden silence

(rumor)
the door swings open with, unexpectedly, no sound
(didn't he tell her to lock the door....? she's smarter than that.....isn't she?)
Fuck yeah she was smarter than that.
It's fucking cold...air conditioning is on...fucking cold.
"RUM'R!"
That alone startles her into awakening. Eyes try to open... almost in slow motion.
where the hell am i....what the fuck? Her memory impaired, drowsy..blink blink its fuzzy..., dizziness, confusion...outright confusion as cobalt blue eyes blin kaway and she tries to springup. No springing here. No in fact it was like she had cinderblocks attached to her shoudlers...
Rolling to one side...to at least see the cause of the disturbance. Things were so fucking blurry.
And if you dont want that flabby stomache, you can have abs of steel in only 4 weeks! The television barks.

She sees him. (who....wait....who is that....Holy shit what is that (BIG ASS GUY) oh it's James...what is James doing....was James that big?) brain takes too much time to process something so simple, and then---
televison CRASHES onto the floor ---
she can feel the rage, she wants to move..she is having a hard time making her brain work with her body
Inturrupting her molassas like thoughts.

Huh? Moving up to sit, looking down at herself. The embarrasment not apparant, cause she is still trying to figure out what the fuck is going on...
or is it a dream?
"Dude..whfuck youbreakn th--" her words just couldnt come out right. What the fuck? So she goes quiet...pulling up a corner of the blanket to cover part of her mostly naked-goosebump covered- body.
Looking around once more, startled ...even spooked...but seemingly just

confused.

(james)
she comes to like molasses
he, on the other hand, is working at Warp 3
(The engines canna hold out much longah, Cap'n!)
she's given but the quickest glance as he storms by
bathroom door seeming to recoil in terror before his hand's able to shove it open
growl echoing off the tiled or paint peeling walls as he finds it empty
(.... is that a good or bad thing?)
appearing once more in the doorway a moment later

luckily, she's burrito'd up in the thin comforter by then, so her embarrassment may be minimal

fear, confusion, spookedness?
that's another matter altogether
the dreadlocked monster's Rage is washing out shockwave
gears getting a bit stuck as they switch over from panic to concern to wrath to a bit of his own confusion
pacing around the small collection of rooms
(predator's prowling search)

front door slams closed on one circuit
locks thrown closed after affirming the place is empty but for he and the groggy kin

"The hell happ'n?"

beyond gutteral words worked out past the sharpened eyeteeth in his mouth
behind the ropey curtain of dreads hanging before animal's glittering eyes
..... there's the undertone of frightened stress tightly controlled by the Ahroun

(rumor)
It isnt the burrito of the comforter masking the embarassment she should have had, its the fact her brainisnt quite putting things together...in fact, she felt like nothing was connecting...Where was Kemp and the bike...wait, she wasnt outside..that was a couple days ago...she was in a -----motel room it seemed.
hes moving at mach speed She is just getting her bearings.
Slowly...now shaking her head a bit to get her eyes to focus dammit.

the dreadlocked monster's Rage is washing out shockwave..
Rage Now even the most disoriented person could feel that rage in the room...
What the fuckkkk
Ok...she could see better now...now if she could just bark out what she was thinking...
"whatthe hell is upwith you...fuck..what are you freaking out about...dude...my fucking head is killing me." Her voice is softer then normal...and slower...But she was coming out of whatever it was she was
in

SLAM the door.....
"yeah that helped thanks" she mutters as she gets up. Looking down at her in a sports bra and underwear..she looks for her clothes...
::blinks::
What the fuck? Grabbing the comforter and making it a wrap-around (no not a toga - this was no toga party) Where the FUCK wereher clothes?

("The hell happ'n?" )
"How the fuck do i know?" she looks at him....pausing.. Eyes to the towels, then the airconditioning unit...fucking cold
"Whatthe fuck is going on?"

(james)
blocked by the angle of his location in relation to the door of the dinky bedroom
she can only hear the deep-chested growl of his frustration
(swallow it down, Jamey-boy, get a hold of yourself....)
sharp staccato of bootsteps eventually slowing
by the time he's outlined in door's open frame - the Gnawer is more man than beast
fingers raking through dreads in attempt to calm
holding back the initial retort about to snap past his lips
(YOU were here! Weren't you??)

"Sorry." apology for the door slammed without anything else to take the stress out on "Look..."

he's by the bedroom window, flicking off the overworked a/c
turning to throw weight against the wall
keeping his distance until electric tide ebbs

"I foun' th' door unlock', tv blarin', scents a two oth'r people 'n four new towel' in here a dunn' belong..." tension rises, she can hear it in his voice, this protective streak, even if his eyes have closed to quell primal blaze "..... air a full blas, 'n you like...."

it drifts off, absent gesture bringing attention to her near-nakedness
as much to save her grace as give him the excuse to not exactly mention it
deep sigh flows in meditative effort at centering
and when his eyes open to look at her for this last part
his voice is considerably softer, lower, careful

"Y'allrigh'?"

(rumor)
That growl just added to the strange sickness already brewing in her stomache. (uh oh i may vomit)
And he comes stalking towards her.... the Gnawer is more man than beast

She watches the manbeast with the airconditioner...his movements like she was watching something on TV..not quite real....Nothing was quite real...nothing at all...Even his voice seemed like it was miles away...and she knew he was talking to her but...wait
what was he saying....
towels..airconditioning...and her..like.."
mostly naked
Where were her clothes?

Y'allrigh'?
"do i look allright?" almost barked, butmore freaked then angry..."where the fuck are my clothes?"...another pause....and slowly emmories flash a bit....
"When i came in...some dude was in here...fucking with the airconditioning unit...." she looks towards it...slowly gathering thoughts..."and i was confused...but what the fuck was I...." she thinks...
"i was gonna take a shower...and he called housekeeping...for towels...but he used...he used some fucking phone..like a nextel walkie talkie thing...i guess i thought that was normal"
another pause. think...
"She came..." eyes glance to look for something..."fucking waters gone...did they drop something in..." another pause....she thinks.."where the fuck are my clothes ...what kind of sick fuck...i mean (had she been violated more then just a prank of some sort?) "
Silent now...as she tries to remember. Then a defense.
"I didnt have time to lock shit....i came in he was here...the rests fucking blurry right now"

(james)
she barks a reply
and no matter how much freak he can hear in raised words
it still gets a reaction from him
whipsnap bristle of the hairs along the back of his neck
muscle beneath t-shirt clinging to shoulders tightening
his head pulls off the wall, deep umber glittering, breath drawn, mouth forming words that.... don't come

gaze drops away to the floor
breath coiling out in sigh
TRYING to remain calm as she explains

and it's something of a losing battle

"This look like a place't's got maid s'rvice 'r a house call handyma'?" instantly regretted as it came out sharper than he intended, even if it's carefully controlled and far smoother than before - he's an animal at heart, and angry... the question being if she can tell that he's more angry with himself than anything, because he said this was a safe place, because he didn't walk her up in effort to make it to work on time "... n' what I meant w's...."

pause. collect. calm.

"I know y'r not okay...... I jus'....." this time he's the one that's stumbling around for words, gaze up, then darts away... suck it up, Jamey-boy: "I dunna how else a ask if y'r hurtin' 'n wanna go down a th' ER f'r a kit."


(rumor)
and it's something of a losing battle
Losing battle it was..and the bark was directed in general, certainly not AT him...her own confusion frustrating her more and more...
"Course it doesnt....i didnt call for a handyman...he was already in here...and i was going to take a shower...doesnt mean i called for room service....it allhappened so fast..i had a glass of water...over there, i was sipping it...who knows...i mean...."
another pause...she didnt remember parts...blackout and she didnt do drugs...she didnt drink...

and now she couldnt help but wonder what the fuck went wrong..what did she do? Was it someone who was plotting soemthing before she got there...and then she got there before the guy had time to leave?

What the hell did she know....watching him, his rage the anger
She shrugs..."cant tell you anything more...somethings fucked up, where the hell are my clothes."
a sickness filling her stomache as her mind fills with what could be....

pause. collect. calm.
Yeah maybe he could be calm--or try to be--she was getting more freaked by the second.

"Imnot goin to the ER...im ....no im fine..i mean, i dont know what the fuck...i " stammering back. And quickly for no reason whatsoever she is looking at James, as he tries to make sense of it all, and she sees Kemp. He's make her laugh...Shaking her head.
Not even sure why pimpleass's face came into her mind..
"Look doya got some clothes here? Maybe t-shirt, sweatpants...I dont think you want Sid flipping you off all night"
a bad attempt at making light of a -possibly- serious situation

(james)
he was watching her grasp for reason in the mental fog
which means she has no interference discerning his expression
for some reason - she will see Kemp
but beyond the imaginary mask, highlighted by the ghostly sheen of tv's floorlight static strobe
something she may not be able to find beyond it's flux on still-crackling Rage
there's an aching sorrow in the Gnawer

that it happened
that she realizes what could have been by his choice of words
that he didn't warn her to run if something wasn't as he expected
that he wasn't here to protect her

"Won' force yeh t'go, though I'd pay f'r it if y' did." pause. uncomfortable. anguished. "Though dun smell nuthin' li'e tha'...."

maybe she'll find it in the fact he cannot meet her gaze
city's top dawg Elder Ahroun dropping his eyes away from mere kin
her bad attempt at humor isn't enough to get even a twitch of appreciative smile
just a sigh - regret - because he simply doesn't know how to deal with this
it's not a brutal Spiral carnage or some dark creature's infiltration - that's where his experience lies
a teenaged girl possibly hurt in ways he doesn't want to mention is completely out of his league

"Yeh." skull lifts in half-gesture towards the battered chest of drawers hiding in a corner "S'me clean stuff'n there."

(rumor)
How things do change....
Things change so quick...As mentally James seems to be blaming and thinking and trying to make things better...Rumor seems to be doing whatshe does best. The blurriness leaving..it had been a while now..or so it seemed. Waling to where he pointed...Dragging the -probably nasty- comforter along the floor with her...Wrapped in it...
No words. Minutes that seem like hours. silence
The battered chest opens.
He was offering to pay, to help She didnt need to go to the ER, but he was offerin to help...
Why?
Why not. For whatever reason he was, and for once she didnt see it as pity or charity...it seemed genuine. But those feelings of fear and confusion were now travelling around the labrynth, past the wall and into a place no one ventured.
No one.
EVER.
Quickly slipping on a sweatshirt and sweatpants...and dropping the comforter to the floor..Her dizziness subsiding..
---------and like that-------------Rumor is back. (a gift she had - how to completely drop the shitty stuff)
"Hey..."she walks back towards him..."Psycho handimen...im supposin i could make some cash off the Enquirer story....maybe throw some aliens in...and something about the mother ship or something"
Now standing behind him...It's like nothing has happend. Nothing at all. How quickly she could change that. A new mask for a new time.
(Still slightly foggy, but ok)
"Well gee, im thinking im cut off for the night...i am not allowed more then 2 waters a night....look what happens...i end up naked on a bed and droolin all over that classy comforter"
Force a smile.
-pause...silence-
can you see through that mask?
And 5 words, so REAL. "Thanks James...I mean it"

(james)
dark eyes still on the floor, he can only hear her move
slow footsteps on the boards, comforter's dragging sweep, drawer's dry slide, fabric unfolding
right along with the borrowed clothes hanging loosely on her frame - she puts on that mask
walking up to him with a forced, plastic smile and humor's distracting salve

more silence passes slow-motion between them
(Thanks James.... I mean it.)
it only seems that with great effort can the Garou lift his gaze once more
if he's able to penetrate that mask - she doesn't have to in return
deep umber pools raw and open like some proverbial book

the Fostern is nothing more than an animal at heart
soul of a primal beast draped in the clothing of human flesh
so striking, these differences: witness to man's tainted ability to lie
confession writ in the beast's (agonized) glance

he tries so hard to hold the smile her jest inspires

"Welc'me." her feelings were true, it was not pity, charity or even abstract obligation which backed his offers, his concern genuine as the wrath fueling deep-seated hunger for revenge on those who tresspassed in his den and assaulted his kin - the Elder truly does care about this girl he's only known but a few days "C'mon... I gotta ma'e s'me calls a get help a fig're out what happ'n 'n who's respons'ble."

hesitation - questions lurking in those earthen eyes
Do you believe I can protect you? Do you trust I will do whatever it takes to make this right? Do you even feel safe around me anymore?
he won't force her confinement under his watch
he won't blame any doubts of him that now fill her mind
he won't question her choice of finding another place she feels safe to stay
the decision is hers to follow him out of the room

"I'll get us 'nother room f'r th' nigh'... " oh, and how much this pains - shames - him to admit "....ain't safe here 'nymore......"


(rumor)
more silence passes slow-motion between them
(Welc'me.)

She notices his reaction...she can tell. As the feelings of confusion and fear are being shoved into the pit of dispair (im a poet and didnt know it) she realizes she has let him down. He was the elder, had wasted his time. his vacation of sorts to take her to his safe place.
-this was why she hadnt had pack before.- If you dont have people who give a shit, you dont have to worry about fucking something up and letting them down...Here he had taken her to his safe place..where did she go wrong
Now look at the mess. Kemps ripple effect. drop a rock in the water...and the ripples all move outward Like the cherry bombs on their meeting.
She wouldnt even think frther then this being something that happened, and never had to be thought about again..'Specially what could possibly have happened.
Joke sent out, but not necesarilly all that funny.

her feelings were true, it was not pity, charity or even abstract obligation which backed his offers, his concern genuine And this she knew. Could she sent the guilt he was feeling.
[False guilt] No...instead she was feeling responsible for becoming the burden.
Way to go Rumor..someone wants to help, you find a way to end up naked and drooling with no recolections.
Now he has to move.
Now his 'safe house' wasnt safe
Now he looked at her like...well like he had been given babysitting job. And she was not pack, she was however family...of sorts.
"Ya dont haveta find out whos responsible..really...it looks like all is in tact, and well, maybe it was someone with an overall fetish, cause they just took my clothes." and mypride
Cobalt blue eyes that still hold the fear and pain, but wont let it out, no not at all...look at him, AT him, for maybe the first time since they had met. Prior, she couldnt lok at him for she would blush...now...she does look at him.
As his eyes are supposed to be saying....
Do you believe I can protect you? Do you trust I will do whatever it takes to make this right? Do you even feel safe around me anymore?
She reads it different....and offers her own look back...
im a pain in the ass, i know, thanks for not just leaving me here, thanks for at least putting up with this shit...never had many who gave a crap..who i can trust...sorry i let you down, i should have realized it first..mayeb i shouldnt drink tap water...or at least watch my drink...im sorry i fucked up your safe place....
She cannot read his eyes at all...in fact her eyes speak back.
"I'll get us 'nother room f'r th' nigh'... " oh, and how much this pains him to admit "....ain't safe here 'nymore......"
A nod and Her hand moves out and takes his arm...stopping him from exiting yet,. Not forcefully, just a light grab....
"Im sorry it isnt safe here anymore...i didnt mean to fuck shit up for you....thanks for giving me another chance...i just...i just didnt know...still dont know.." The next part comes out of her lips, but she really thought she was just thinking it...hearing her own words, and surprised they were audible. "Im freaked a bit, if ya dont mind...i will go with ya..i mean, i dont know if they were after me, or anyone, but if they did come back...id feel better knowing you were there..." yes folks that was SAID...and she feels silly
(what could i have done differently???) releasing his arm..again the grasp just to get him not to walk out, it wasnt restraining. Fingers on fleash. Hands cold....15 and she doesnt even know...if the worst thing could have happened...She wont think about it...not now.
She offers onemore shot at making him at least smirk. "Sorry you had to be flipped off by Sid Viscious"

[pause... ish]

Posted by james at May 21, 2004 12:00 AM