Have you ever had one of those mornings where you just wake up and crave something?

I'm not talking munchies here, this is full body laying curled up in your covers realizing your outright whimpering type of crave...... th ekind that makes you want to submit..... to...... to subjugate yourself in unquestioning worship

Genuflection is just not enough.

Sure, you can fall to your knees.... you can crawl, beg, offer yourself unbridled and push yourself so far past the edge you're not even sure you'll find you way back..... but that's not enough, that..... is never..... enough.

It's not jus tabout being consumed....... it's about consuming.... fully, 100%, taking until there is nothing left and you're wrapped around an empty exhausted shell of whatever it is that, itself, gave completely.

I'm not talking about sex, it goes deeper than that level of physical and mental gratification, deeper than power exchanges..... that horizon much farther away than any piece of leather, metal or latex can take you. Even farther than any needle. Here is where you delve into the psyche. Find something that simply a taste makes you quake..... something you yearn for with every fiber of your being when it's gone - even if you know it 's coming back. Something you love.... and something you regret. But something so fulfilling there is not a moment of pain for that short while you are cradled in it's proverbial arms.

Could it even touch you......

And what, perchance, happens when this love.... this craving.... this infatuation is nothing more than a ghost? It maybe existed once, in a dream world, for a few minutes - maybe half an hour - before you crushed that candle's flame? You shared the devil's waltz...... once...... And now....... now it's untouchable.

One flame that shall never be rekindled...... something lost in a past chapter in which you can never remember the exact page, only a fuzzy memory which cries to be clarified...... whispered voice keening on every breath of wind tha tpasses your ears, such soft words full of fear..... and seduction.

You can fall victim to that sweet purr every time, you can reach out, beckoning..... begging..... but never once will you be able to graze your fingers against it..... not without pain, not without regret, not without dissatisfaction of unappeased hunger..... it's a cock-tease, a mind game, a half regret and a sentient memory

And all you can do is lay there and crave..

((bit o' creative writing though not 100% fiction, (C)2000, author in his own name))